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Post by hellsbells on Aug 25, 2011 15:16:28 GMT -5
I've only just started to read up about him, given that he's not in my neck of the woods, and he seems to genuinely care about women's health and this damn disease.
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Post by jessabug on Aug 25, 2011 15:32:35 GMT -5
Whew! I just love hearing from you guys, and finding out that you understand why I feel how I feel. I don't think he'll be like that either Jenaya, I think it's just my nerves getting to me!
On another note... sad news.. and a question. My pain has been ramping up the past few days, and I just discovered this afternoon a generous amount of very dark brown, clotty discharge in my panties. The past couple of days prior to today it was just like plain water (is that normal, btw? I have it like that often). Remember, I'm now on continuous nuvaring and shouldn't be getting a period. And, besides that, my period usually comes around the 2nd/3rd of each month. I used to get it at the end of my periods all the time, but never randomly in the middle of the month. Do any of you know what this is? Some funky pseudo-period of sorts that just came early or what..?
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Post by Karen on Aug 25, 2011 16:49:26 GMT -5
Any sort of change with your hormones can result in a change in cervical fluid. If you're having some spotting, that also points to hormones. Something's off. If you weren't on BC at all, you'd notice more of a fluctuation with your cervical fluid on a regular basis.
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Post by JC on Aug 25, 2011 17:05:02 GMT -5
I got that a couple of times when I was on the nuva ring. It didn't usually last long.
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Post by 1234 on Aug 26, 2011 8:38:17 GMT -5
I know that this isn't very encouraging, but I bled on any and all birth control I was ever on. Not all the time, but pretty damn close. I had less bleeding on the nuvaring, but still a lot--I sort of controlled it by a combination of vivelle dots (?)--menopausal patches that deliver a VERY low dose of estrogen. It sucked, but that cocktail kept the bleeding more under control than anything else.
Anyway, particularly on continuous bc, breakthrough bleeding is really normal.
When does your school start back, Jess? Just thinking you have a lot going on right now.
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Post by jessabug on Aug 26, 2011 13:00:48 GMT -5
Kristin, I do have lots going on right now but I'm trying my best to juggle everything! School starts on the 26th of september. This week is going to be a doozy! I move out of my evil friend's apartment on the 1st... but I have Redwine's appt. on the 29th.. so today and tomorrow I'm here cleaning and organizing stuff so that I'm ready to move out, I meet my new roommate tonight which I'm pretty excited for, and then Sunday I go back to Bend for my appointment with Redwine on Monday, then Tuesday night we drive back to Eugene with my 18 year old brother in tow so that he can help Jake move my bed & dresser, then Wednesday we're moving me into my new apartment, and I'll probably finish that by Thursday/Friday, and then my mom will come on Saturday to help me clean the old place top to bottom (I want to make the entire apartment immaculate so that Caitlin doesn't have anything to bitch about.. last time when her old roommate was leaving and I was moving in she kept talking about how gross Cindy left everything and how they don't know how to clean and finding any reason she could to talk sh*t lol). And then on Tuesday we're going to sign the lease over to the new girl! And it's funny because Caitlin is coming ALL THE WAY FROM CALI (an 8+ hour drive) to "make sure things run smoothly" ... she did this last time when her old roommate left and I moved in too, because she wanted to make sure that her old roommate didn't take her things. I'm certain that I'm getting the same treatment, but I think it's hilarious. I had a feeling breakthrough bleeding would be considered pretty typical on continuous birth control, I've heard that a lot, but what I'm wondering more specificially is even though it's a normal thing and nothing to worry about it, doesn't it kinda defeat the purpose of continuous BC, and perhaps mean that this method isn't really working for me? Thanks for the concern Kristin You know, I was really down last week and super emotional and overwhelmed and stressed, but I feel like I've finally realized that I can't change what's happening, and I don't do myself any favors by freaking out over it all. I don't need to waste my time and energy worrying over stupid things like whether or not I'll have enough energy to maintain my hectic lifestyle.. so I've kind of simmered down and decided to take one thing at a time. Today, it's calmly and happily sorting out my clothes to take to good will and meeting my new roommate tonight.
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Post by 1234 on Aug 26, 2011 14:31:37 GMT -5
That does sound completely insane. What a schedule! I'm glad that you're moving out though--what a relief. You can then wash your hands of this woman and get on with your life. Certainly plenty going on. Glad also that you're feeling a little less overwhelmed. Learning to take things one day at a time is really hard, but it's so useful. Don't be upset at yourself if you get overwhelmed again--patience and acceptance are often hard to hold on to, particularly as things get tense.
I don't know about defeating the purpose of continuous BC--the point of BC is to stop you from ovulating so you can't get pregnant. All the other uses are applied versions of its primary use, so it's not going to be 100% predictable. But, I'll let one of hte other ladies that knows more about BC chime in. Since they all made me bleed, I just am not very informed!
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Post by JC on Aug 30, 2011 6:22:50 GMT -5
What happened at your appointment? You're keeping me in suspense! I hope it went well!!!
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Post by jessabug on Aug 31, 2011 0:25:07 GMT -5
Bwah! Sorry! Yesterday was a difficult day, and today was a busy one. I've got good news and bad news, so I figured it would be best to wait until I'm not an emotional wreck to post on here so that I'm not such a debbie downer about everything Haha. First things first, a little bit about Dr. Redwine: He is just as amazing as you all anticipated he would be! I was SO nervous for the appointment, but his whole staff was truly wonderful. Deena, his.. nurse (?), was very sweet and knew I was nervous because my diastolic BP was through the roof (haha). I know everyone is different, but the reason why Redwine and his team are such an amazing fit for me and such a breath of fresh are is because they were warm, friendly, and FUNNY. Funny is a key thing for me. I really appreciated their sense of humor, because it helped me to relax. Dr. Redwine was cracking jokes during my entire appointment, and I was laughing so hard. I really loved that because it kept me from doing the opposite and crying lol. I had kind of imagined him as a more stern man for some reason, so it was very refreshing to find that he is instead a very charismatic and entertaining person! Deena was there for the exam, which was interesting but also spoke to Dr. Redwine's prowess, because I've never had a male doctor use a witness. Not that I care much, but I thought it was very professional of him. When he got down to business, he did definitely touch all the right spots as it DID hurt. Then we went into his office... (side note, his sons are HOT.. don't judge me) He showed me a pamphlet that had labeled parts of the pelvis. You know, ovaries, uterus, cul-de-sac, utero-sacral ligaments, etc.. and then he basically outlined where he found things in the pelvic exam. He is 100% confident that I am still suffering from endometriosis and his hunch is that it is primarily in the cul-de-sac because that's where I felt so much pain. I asked him about my "ovarian" pain, which you girls have heard me complain of plenty. I explained that it felt like it was radiating down my leg sometimes and even into my back, and asked what it could be if not ovarian (oh, during the pelvic exam he kinda fondled my ovaries and I didn't feel anything at all, which surprised me) and he said that it's most likely endometriosis on my utero-sacral ligaments. He also said that sometimes when surgeons use electrocautery they leave behind deposits (I want to say like.. charcoal? calcium? something that started with a C) that can cause significant pain, so that could be a possibility too. He also mentioned that he believes I have a problem with uterine pain (I feel dumb because I was so intent on covering my planned questions that I didn't think to ask him to elaborate on that).. he said it in a kind of funny way, I'm not sure how to take it, but he was like "Well, you sort of have two problems. You have endometriosis, which is obvious to me based on your pelvic exam, and then you have a problem with uterine cramping and pain." I don't know how to explain it, but the way he said it made it seem as though I have some sort of condition that causes me to have more severe uterine pain than is normal (like how sometimes I just throb down there, and how I have cramps & backache every day no matter where I am in my cycle). Dr. Redwine went on to tell me that when you have endometriosis, these are your options: you can do nothing, you can go the medical route (i.e. NSAIDS, hormones, etc.), or you can go the surgical route. He said, well, you're in a lot of pain, so obviously nothing isn't much of an option; you've been on birth control for 7 years, and that hasn't worked; so pretty much, surgery is your only option. But the good thing is, with the way we do it, there is a very high success rate. He then went on to talk about excision and how it significantly alleviates symptoms and has a very low recurrence rate. After all was said and done, he maintained his recommendation that I undergo another laparoscopy with excision as well as a presacral neurectomy. Now for the sad part.. He told me that without surgery, it is safe to assume that my quality of life will continue to be sub-par (i.e. the pain won't just "vanish" one day) and that gradually, my pain will increase. I could expect that certain aspects of my lifestyle would change dramatically, such as being able to ride my horse. If you remember, I have been complaining that each time I try to ride Lilly, I have excruciating pains during and for the next day afterwards I have throbbing pains that radiate down my legs. He pretty much told me that that will never change unless I have surgery. So, it's obvious that I need to have the surgery. The problem is that the next available surgery date that works with my academic calendar is December 13th, and the expected recovery time for my surgery is 2 months, during which I am not allowed to lift anything over 15lbs or exercise. So, we're looking at Valentines' day before my life is back to normal. Don't get me wrong girls.. I am so excited to live again, but I think a damper has been placed on my enthusiasm because the bottom line is that I can't keep Lilly. And that makes me really, really sad and depressed. Period. But my parents and I have come to the agreement/understanding that it is what's best for me and Lil. I can't just have her sitting around in a stall all summer, not being worked at all. That weighs heavily on my conscience. There are so many other aspects of this that come into play that I won't go into detail on because I don't want to bore you or over-share, but basically I have to sell my horse.. and that's the bad news. So there was lots of crying yesterday... and a little today but not much... for the most part I've bucked up and stayed strong. I don't want you girls to think that I'm not grateful that I'm getting the surgery, because I really am. I am so excited to have my life back and to be pain free again, but I'm just sad that it comes at such a great expense and since this was just decided, the cut is still fresh so it's rained quite a bit on my celebration But all in all, I GLADLY recommend Dr. Redwine to ALL of you who can see him. He is truly an amazing man and physician and he knows SO much about endo. I asked him upwards of 20 questions and he had an answer for every single one. OH, speaking of which, the reason we're fatigued all the time has something to do with the inflammation (or whatever causes inflammation, you doctor people out there know better than I do--I'm clueless!) in our abdomen extending into the bloodstream or something, and so our body exhausts itself because of that. Cool huh! And he also said of the obgyn that said I was full of adhesions and that I couldn't do more surgery because it would increase my risk of infertility: "my mom told me that if I don't have something nice to say, I shouldn't say anything at all..." aka she's batsh*t crazy and I shouldn't go back to her again. He also said that it's sad, but some doctors would rather sit there and make sh*t up than to say "well, I don't really know how to do surgery for endometriosis." SO TRUE! And how wonderful it was to hear that out of the mouth of another DOCTOR! I had an absolutely wonderful experience with Dr. Redwine and am very much looking forward to my surgeries with him, despite the long road ahead. Anybody want a horse...? She's cute...
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Post by italialynn on Aug 31, 2011 7:26:55 GMT -5
I won't go into my experiences with endo-specialists because this will be a novel, but you're in FANTASTIC hands. The CEC didn't help much because I developed severe adhesions, but this last surgeon worked wonders (obviously, I'm pregnant and pain-free). With that being said, please don't sell your horse. Two months goes by in the blink of an eye, and you'll be recovered faster than you think....isn't there anyone you could lease her to for a few months who could possibly take over her bills? Maybe a young girl that could at least just take her out and groom her a few times a week? I'm not sure if you're financial situation is driving the decision, but if you're anything like me, horses are my saving grace - mentally. You'd be surprised at how just being around her could aid in your recovery... Good luck and so glad you're in great hands!!!
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Post by 1234 on Aug 31, 2011 8:05:22 GMT -5
Jess, I know it was a bit of a roller coaster, and with Lilly too, but I am so, so happy you went to Dr. Redwine and have the option of doing this surgery. It will throw a wrench in your college year, but it's SUCH an opportunity to be able to have surgery with Dr. Redwine and get a good chance at an endo-free (or endo-reduced ), life. I do like Talia's suggestion of getting someone to horse-sit Lilly, give her some exercise, etc. When I was 12, there is nothing I better I could have possibly asked in teh world. We were dirt poor and couldn't afford much, much less horses, but all I wanted to do from teh age of 8 was ride horses. I finally convinced someone at a local farm to let me muck out the stalls, groom teh horses, etc in exchange for riding. There might be a similarly horse-struck girl out there in Oregon! BTW, the inflammation thing is why my bizarre potpourri of drugs at teh moment is turmeric, pepper, kelp, and gin soaked raisins. Trying to get the inflammation down!
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Post by jessabug on Aug 31, 2011 12:08:38 GMT -5
Talia, I had a feeling you would suggest something like that, and we've already talked about it part of the issue is financial, and part of it is that I'm a complicated person lol. I can never seem to stop myself from feeling guilty. The way I see it, if I sell Lilly, I'm letting her down, so I feel like sh*t, but if I keep her, I'm letting my parents down, so I feel like sh*t. Either way, I don't feel good! There are a few reasons I'm leaning towards selling her. Obviously, there's the 6 months that I'll be virtually MIA. Since all of this started for me in March, it will basically be almost a year that poor Lilly hardly ever sees her momma. Which I feel awful for. Another reason I'm leaning towards selling her is because of financial reasons. She costs my parents upwards of $300 each month to maintain, and that's including partial care. I'd have to ramp that up to full care, because I just can't see myself getting to the barn (20 minutes from my apartment) every day. That, combined with the thousands of dollars my parents will now have to spend on my surgery, also makes me feel terrible. And then there's the fact that my parents have been pointing out to me the fact that horse OWNERSHIP doesn't really fit my lifestyle (I'm in my senior year of my undergrad, and plan on an immediate segue into grad school for 2 years). And thennn there's the fact that apparently in my absence, my horse has become evil. My BO told me yesterday that she breaks through all the hotwire fences and strikes and charges at them when they try to put her out to pasture because I guess she wants to be with other specific horses and when she isn't placed with them, she has a freak out. Lilly was never like this before. Now I feel like she's become a horse that I don't even know HOW to deal with, which really really worries me. So.. that's why I'm in such a pickle =/ Kristin, how do you take that cocktail?? Lol? PS -- I did the same thing as you with horsies when I was 12! Aww.
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Post by alivenkicking on Aug 31, 2011 12:26:25 GMT -5
aw, girl, i hate to hear of your dilemma with lilly... i hate that we often lose some of the things that are most important to us in trying to handle this disease. big hope on the horizon with upcoming surgery is HUGE - congratulations!! but lilly seems to be acting out and your guilt isn't helping her, your folks, and most especially YOU! i totally relate, sometimes i suffer more than my critters do if i even sense that something is amiss and then beat myself up for it. if you feel in your heart that the best thing for lilly is to sell her, you can channel your guilt into finding great people for her, and even work out permission to visit her without the stress. and with your folks, let them determine what they are and aren't able to do financially and accept it - without feeling guilty! i know very much how that is easier said than done, i struggle with it every day myself, but guilt is TOXIC and doesn't lead us to helpful solutions! it just festers and makes you feel bad about yourself, and your body responds to that, making the pain worse, yada yada. remind yourself you are doing the best you can in the situation you've been dealt, and that is ALOT!! wishing you well...
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Post by hellsbells on Aug 31, 2011 13:04:23 GMT -5
So excited you're getting the best of care, but sorry about Lilly. Curious though Jess - why the 2 month recovery? What's he gonna do???
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Post by jessabug on Aug 31, 2011 13:09:56 GMT -5
I'm not sure, I think part of it might be that he's very careful about making sure his patients recover correctly and in a timely manner, but he's doing a laparoscopy w/full excision of endo and a presacral neurectomy. He talked a little about how pressing yourself (which we talk about a lot on here!!) can really interfere with your recovery. But also I haven't done much research yet, and I'm not really sure how much a presacral neurectomy does to you in terms of recovery. I know he goes in laparascopically though. But after my experience with my first lap, when I pushed myself WAY too hard and a 4 day recovery turned into a 1 month recovery, I'm all for listening to him and abiding by his recovery rules. lol. And hey, I'm in college where you have to pay to park.. so I'm pretty okay with a handicap parking spot haha
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