Post by chloelouise on Apr 17, 2007 4:12:21 GMT -5
>:(So here's my rant, and it will be a long one so please bare with me. These are all the things I never say but need to to get them off my chest. I'm sorry but I just need to get it out.
MY LIFE!!!! I try not to be bitter, and I DONT want to end up bitter but I feel like thats the way Im going.
I am generally known as un lucky, Members of my dads parish note that I am un lucky. Which sucks because its nothing to do with them but there you go, when you're a vicars daughter you are everybodys property.
In December Tony and I moved into my dream house, its a beautiful two bedroom house with a lovely garden tucked away in the countryside with great views!! Our garden backs on to fields and we have a pond! Ive always wanted a pond and I think the garden is half the reason I fell in love with the place. ;D
Four days after we moved in, FOUR DAYS I had an accident on my moped and even though we're 4 months on Ive still only got 50% normal movement in my neck, for the first two I couldnt move my neck at all. It has been painful and frustrating and I just want it to get better.
I was on sick with work for a month then came the call, the child that my contract was tied to had died and I was being made redundant. That was my dream job, I was working with children who have severe and profound learning difficluties and although it was a challenge it was so rewarding. All of my so called friends at work didnt bother to get in touch, since the end of the Christmas term I havent heard from one of them. Here I was thinking we were friends. I guess not.
Then more great news, three days after I lost my job Tony came home in a horrible mood, turned out that company he was working for was going under and he too was being made redundant.
I rung my landlady to explain and said we had the rent for this month and I was going to sell my moped so we could afford the rent for next month but I was going to have to call social to see if I could get help with the rent after that. And the good luck continues, my landlady hasnt told the taxman that there are tenants in the house so no I cant ask social for help.
EVERY DAY is a financial struggle, we couldnt afford to eat if my mum and dad didnt do our food shopping. Tony has a new job but doesnt get paid until the end of the month, so we are completely broke, we can just about afford to get tony to work but again thats only becaue my mum and dad give us a bit of money each week. (My parents have been God sent the last couple of months)
The there's tony family, if you can even call them a family, they know how tough things are at the minute but they just dont care, Tony rung his mum to tell her that we had both lost our jobs and she didnt care, and didnt bother to ring again, Tony rung her on Mothers day and she had a go cus we didnt send a card. WE CANT AFFORD A STAMP LET ALONE A CARD.
My endo is getting more and more painful, I cramp three weeks a month now, I want a job, but Im just not well enough to work.
All my friends that I went to school with have ditched me, yeah cheers for that guys.
Perhaps my biggest rant at the minute is my bowels... enough said!
Tony and I have always had a very "physically close" relationship but now everytime we have sex I end up in tears.
I feel very cheated, like what did I do to deserve all this. I could cope much better if it wasnt EVERYTHING falling apart but its just getting to much. It maes me so angry and Im rubbish at being angry so I just cry. =
People might be inclined to think that this is just a bad spell and things will get better but oh ny my friends since I was 10 something good happens then three horrible things happen.
I am so fed up, I am so pee'd off with working round under a rain cloud. When I get stressed I get very bad mouth ulcers which then makes me feel weak cus I cant eat.
WHEN AM I GONNA GET A BREAK!!!!
I see all these lucky people around me and I think if I could just have a bit of thier luck things would be better, what makes some people so unlucky and some people really really lucky, who decides? Do we make our own fate? What did I do soooooo wrong as a child to have all this bad luck. Its making me crazy!!!!
I am very good at putting on the happy face, (another thing that comes from being a vicars daughter) I dont like to voice my issues because I dont like to be a burden, but here is my rant, all the things Ive wanted to say for months but havent. sorry guys just needed to rant!!!!
MY LIFE!!!! I try not to be bitter, and I DONT want to end up bitter but I feel like thats the way Im going.
I am generally known as un lucky, Members of my dads parish note that I am un lucky. Which sucks because its nothing to do with them but there you go, when you're a vicars daughter you are everybodys property.
In December Tony and I moved into my dream house, its a beautiful two bedroom house with a lovely garden tucked away in the countryside with great views!! Our garden backs on to fields and we have a pond! Ive always wanted a pond and I think the garden is half the reason I fell in love with the place. ;D
Four days after we moved in, FOUR DAYS I had an accident on my moped and even though we're 4 months on Ive still only got 50% normal movement in my neck, for the first two I couldnt move my neck at all. It has been painful and frustrating and I just want it to get better.
I was on sick with work for a month then came the call, the child that my contract was tied to had died and I was being made redundant. That was my dream job, I was working with children who have severe and profound learning difficluties and although it was a challenge it was so rewarding. All of my so called friends at work didnt bother to get in touch, since the end of the Christmas term I havent heard from one of them. Here I was thinking we were friends. I guess not.
Then more great news, three days after I lost my job Tony came home in a horrible mood, turned out that company he was working for was going under and he too was being made redundant.
I rung my landlady to explain and said we had the rent for this month and I was going to sell my moped so we could afford the rent for next month but I was going to have to call social to see if I could get help with the rent after that. And the good luck continues, my landlady hasnt told the taxman that there are tenants in the house so no I cant ask social for help.
EVERY DAY is a financial struggle, we couldnt afford to eat if my mum and dad didnt do our food shopping. Tony has a new job but doesnt get paid until the end of the month, so we are completely broke, we can just about afford to get tony to work but again thats only becaue my mum and dad give us a bit of money each week. (My parents have been God sent the last couple of months)
The there's tony family, if you can even call them a family, they know how tough things are at the minute but they just dont care, Tony rung his mum to tell her that we had both lost our jobs and she didnt care, and didnt bother to ring again, Tony rung her on Mothers day and she had a go cus we didnt send a card. WE CANT AFFORD A STAMP LET ALONE A CARD.
My endo is getting more and more painful, I cramp three weeks a month now, I want a job, but Im just not well enough to work.
All my friends that I went to school with have ditched me, yeah cheers for that guys.
Perhaps my biggest rant at the minute is my bowels... enough said!
Tony and I have always had a very "physically close" relationship but now everytime we have sex I end up in tears.
I feel very cheated, like what did I do to deserve all this. I could cope much better if it wasnt EVERYTHING falling apart but its just getting to much. It maes me so angry and Im rubbish at being angry so I just cry. =
People might be inclined to think that this is just a bad spell and things will get better but oh ny my friends since I was 10 something good happens then three horrible things happen.
I am so fed up, I am so pee'd off with working round under a rain cloud. When I get stressed I get very bad mouth ulcers which then makes me feel weak cus I cant eat.
WHEN AM I GONNA GET A BREAK!!!!
I see all these lucky people around me and I think if I could just have a bit of thier luck things would be better, what makes some people so unlucky and some people really really lucky, who decides? Do we make our own fate? What did I do soooooo wrong as a child to have all this bad luck. Its making me crazy!!!!
I am very good at putting on the happy face, (another thing that comes from being a vicars daughter) I dont like to voice my issues because I dont like to be a burden, but here is my rant, all the things Ive wanted to say for months but havent. sorry guys just needed to rant!!!!