|
Post by ouchy on Sept 12, 2006 15:42:13 GMT -5
I started my period last night and didn't go to work today, because the cramps were from HELL!
My mom came online and sent me a message. I told her that I was home from work because of cramps. She tried to tell me that they can't be that bad... yerrite!!! Coming from someone w/out endometriosis!!! I tried to explain to her that what we women w/ endo experience is close to childbirth contractions. She took offense to this saying that there is NOTHING that can possibly be THAT painful, except for actual labor itself (even though she had cesareans w/ all of us kids). I told her that several women on this site have said that what we experience w/ cramps each month is pretty much just like being in labor. I also told her that sometimes cramps we experience can be worse than labor (from what my gynecologist has told me), because w/ labor, most women don't pass out, and one time my cramps were so bad that i DID pass out. She told me that she had bad cramps when she was little and that she had to go home from school at least twice...WOOOPTYYYY! I wish that is how MY pain was...I'd settle for THAT level of "bad cramps"...
...her reply, "I was crawling on the floor with spastic reflux esophagitis" WTF!!!! What does that have to do w/ anything??? She's soooooooooo weird! I don't even know why I discuss anything that has to do w/ endo with my mom. She'll never get it. I don't usually discuss it w/ her, as I know it's a waste of time and I shouldn't waste my energy, but for some reason I did, and I see she is still wayyyyyyyy too immature to get it.
|
|
|
Post by candice on Sept 12, 2006 17:04:49 GMT -5
I hear ya. Mine likes to take the "there's nothing wrong with you that can't be fixed with the next Dr. appointment" routine. She makes me talk about it and then complaines that I'm "too negative". Last time she coerced an update out of me she suggested that I "stop thinking about it until the Dr. can fix it". Fix it? ? Grrrr. Anyway, I feel your pain. No pun intended.
|
|
|
Post by ouchy on Sept 12, 2006 17:12:27 GMT -5
Hey, candice. Thanks for reading my rant! Some people just never will get it...and looks like our mothers are two of them!
|
|
|
Post by mwilmot on Sept 13, 2006 15:26:30 GMT -5
I try to never disguss it with my mom because she's crazy. She said all I have to do is to have positive thoughts and take lots of Vitamin E and Calcium. Calcium is her cure for everything. She told me the other night that I shouldn't have the next surgery because there would be a miracle and I would be healed...see she's crazy. My sisters are good sounding boards and we call each other instead of my mom when we have health issues but it is hard for me to avoid it with her since I've been having the surgeries.
|
|
tinabug
New Member
this is the way I feel most of the time
Posts: 10
|
Post by tinabug on Sept 14, 2006 17:47:53 GMT -5
Hey guys - I hear ya on all of it. My brother just laid into me this past weekend saying it's all in my head. I've the Lap. and if he could see the pics or do some research maybe he would somewhat know we go through. It's like if they can't see what's wrong with you (like a broke leg) then they think it's all in our head. Good luck - Luckily my mom is very understanding and she's a nurse also though. She's very supportive. I'm now doing the Depo Lupron treatments and I'm nervous of what's to come with that. We'll see. Good luck to you both and I hope that your mom's come around. Tell them you need support right now not negativity. Tell them to do some research to learn about it instead of being ignorant.
|
|
|
Post by sandcastle on Sept 22, 2006 9:05:27 GMT -5
I wonder why so many people think we're lying about the pain. Why would we pretend to be in such horrible pain if we weren't? I think we seriously need to raise some awareness about endometriosis.
|
|
|
Post by katie35 on Oct 11, 2006 14:25:41 GMT -5
OMG I think we all have the same mom. My mom just acts like I'm a big baby . She always says who knows all women may have endo and just not know it because some people just deal with it better. I could just scream when she says insulting things like that. If she had it she would know something was wrong. Don't you agree? I feel guilty when I bring it up anymore because I can hear her boredom start as soon as I mention it. I remember the day of my laproscopic surgery. I wasn't sure if I had endo or possibly ovarian cancer and I was terrified. When my Dr told me it was stage 3 endo I was so relieved, but I had no idea what endo really was at that moment. I only knew he had said no cancer, so I was happy and still am as far as that goes. My familys reaction was (See! now quit worrying!) From that moment on noone has actted like a thing is wrong with me. If anything they don't want to know, so I have learned to not talk to them. I'm so glad I can talk to you all and know you understand.
|
|
|
Post by mariewynn on Oct 15, 2006 3:44:11 GMT -5
I understand the frustration with you mothers. This whole thing has just built up the resentment I have for mine from other stuff. I've had this problem since I first had my period around 12 years old and I thought I was dying, waking up with such horrible pain and blood. She should've known to take me to a gynocologist then but she NEVER did. Her idea of getting me help was to take me to the ER (we didn't have insurance but there are clinics around here and assistance programs, she just never looked into them). I ended up dropping out of high school because of this. And now I am on the brink of losing my job because I found out at the age of 22 (earlier this year) that I have endo and so far treatments (lap in feb and hormone treatments) aren't working. All of this could have been taken care of had she done her job. And the worst part is, she doesn't see how she did anything wrong. I could just scream sometimes she makes me so mad.
|
|
|
Post by erzulie on Oct 15, 2006 10:07:02 GMT -5
She definitely could and should have done more, but perhaps you are being a little harsh. Most likely even if sdhe had done everything right you would still be in the same position. Most doctors ignore adolescents who complain of pain. When you were 12 and just starting your period, 99% of doctors would have assumed you were just having trouble dealing with your body's changes and would have sent you home with some ibuprofen! You would have been hard-pressed to find a doctor who would have given you a laparoscopy at that age. Even if you had, they would have given you the same hormonal treatments that aren't working for you now. I started having severe pain at 15 and my mother took me very seriously. She took me to several doctors and even suggested she thought I might have endometriosis, and none of them thought it was likely. I didn't get diagnosed until age 24. There are moms on this board who are pulling their hair out because they are doing everything they can for their daughters and nothing is helping. Certainly your mother should have been more supportive but to blame her for everything is probably going a bit far. At least she did something which is more than some people can say for their moms.
|
|
|
Post by ouchy on Oct 15, 2006 10:43:12 GMT -5
^agree w/ erzulie.
|
|
|
Post by mariewynn on Oct 15, 2006 19:54:10 GMT -5
I guess you would have to know my Mom and really know my situation to get it. Some people should have never been parents, my mother one of them. There's other things she neglected as well, and with all the trouble I'm having now it's a constant reminder that she didn't care enough to try to do something. Instead she called me a drama queen and ignored me. Parenting isn't her forte and as much as I try, probably gonna take some therapy before I can be totally forgiving.
|
|
|
Post by cherry on Oct 29, 2006 5:00:55 GMT -5
My mum also gets sick of hearing about as soon as i open my mouth, she huffs and sighs and stares into space.... a woman who had a hysterectomy because of her endo! Maybe cos I dont go round making others miserable when i am, she thinks i am making it up and has as much as said so! At first she was supportive, for all of about a week, and since then my lil sis has picked up the slack bringing me painkillers and milk, and always a hotwater bottle that she uses for her own period pains whenever she heard me crying. She is such a sweety. My mum wasn't too good with the motherly thing as I was growing up but this anger at me asking her how I can do this or that to help, it was the last straw. I no longer live with her, and have had a great change of heart although things were at first bumpy. She was always making herself the victim of things, but i am no longer the victim of my own body!
|
|
|
Post by ouchy on Oct 29, 2006 12:13:54 GMT -5
She was always making herself the victim of things, but i am no longer the victim of my own body! Good quote! That's how I feel about my mom.
|
|
|
Post by candice on Oct 29, 2006 17:52:11 GMT -5
Wow...good quote. "no longer the victim of my own body". God, the day I feel like that I'm going to have a parade.
|
|
|
Post by cherry on Oct 29, 2006 19:02:39 GMT -5
That comment sounds very one dimensional but it does refer to more than my endo... i just didnt want to bore you all with my explanation of what! Believe me saying that doesn't come easily, and it can only be said with feeling on a good day!
|
|