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Post by lizzylou on Mar 30, 2010 21:30:09 GMT -5
My fiance's best friend of 15+ years and his wife have this dog. It's a 3 year odl Lahsa Apso. The wife thinks this dog is really well trained but in reality, it's just a small dog so you don't notice as much. The dog is aggressive to other dogs and the wife just makes up excuses for him on it.
Recently the dog snapped at one of their friend's children (less than a year old). I'm not positive what the situation was, but the baby touched him and he snapped at her. A week ago, their daughter came up to the dog, he snapped at her and got her in the face. The wife has made about 3 excuses now for why she thinks he might have snapped and says "it doesn't excuse the behavior BUT...{insert excuse here}". He didn't break the skin but it was red and puffy where he got her (which means teeth got her face). They handed the situation by "scolding the dog"
I'm a firm believer that parents need to watch their kids with animals. BUT...My fiance and I aren't comfortable having my son (5) around their dog now. I feel that it's only a matter of time until he snaps at someone else and I don't want that person to be my child.
My fiance wants to tell them right away that we won't be bringing my son over anymore because their dog is aggressive to get it done and out of the way. I'd rather wait for the situation to come up and just decline bringing my son there, and if she asks then I can say that i'm not comfortable.
Am I over reacting? Their response is going to be MAJORLY defensive and they are going to say we're over reacting.
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Post by pamelaj on Mar 31, 2010 6:29:54 GMT -5
Lizzy;
You are absolutely NOT over reacting in my eyes. Children are a precious gift and protecting them is our natural instinct.
One of my friends had a dog for 7 years and it snapped at her 2 year old. She had the dog prior to her child but as soon as that happened, she got rid of the dog.
Im shocked though that a Lapso Apso would be acting like that.
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Post by lizzylou on Mar 31, 2010 7:06:05 GMT -5
Really? with a tiny bit of googling I've found that they aren't good dogs for kids.
My grandparents had one when I was a child and she was awful with us too.
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Post by JC on Mar 31, 2010 7:46:11 GMT -5
I don't think you're over reacting at all. I think you're being a good parent. I don't care how small a dog is. An agressive dog is an aggressive dog. I used to have a pit bull and if he ever snapped at anyone the entire city would have been in an uproar just because of his breed. A dog that bites is bad in my eyes I don't care how small they are. I don't blame you one bit for not wanting to take your child around it. I also think that your friends should understand when you tell them you are not comfortable having your child around the dog because of how unpredictable it can be. Better to be safe than to find your poor child bitten and with a nasty infection.
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 1, 2010 21:00:24 GMT -5
Ok...so i kind of talked to my friend today because the topic came up and I pointed out that the dog is unpredictable and aggressive to kids. Basically...*sigh*...she thinks it's fine. She thinks her dog is ok, but other people's dog doing the same thing for the same reasons aren't ok. She basically said her dog is unpredictable but has excuses for why it's ok. She actually said and one point in the conversation that she's leaving her dog at home this weekend because some family will have their kids someplace she's going to be and she "can't trust THEIR kids" with her dog. hmmm....
I still didn't mention that I wasn't comfortable having my son by her dog, because she was pretty defensive to start. And when the time comes that my son is invited over, I will decline and explain I'm not comfortable.
I feel a bit frustrated at this point. My fiance was in the conversation with me and he held his ground but not nearly as strong as I would have liked. I hope in the future when push comes to shove, he doesn't back down in fear of offending his friend.
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Post by JC on Apr 4, 2010 12:36:59 GMT -5
Under her logic, I would say, "Geez I have this tendancy to just punch puppies. I have an excuse though cause I have this genetic disorder that causes me to have a punch reflex when I see a dog snipping at my kid so that makes it ok. So if I accidentally punch your dog, don't worry because I have a good excuse for why it's ok!!" lol I like your idea of declining an offer to be invited over. I think it will speak louder than just telling her you're not ok with it. Have you told your fiance how you feel about him being a little passive about it? Maybe if you put it to him that it's important for you to be able to have him back you up on this issue and that you felt a little left out in the cold when the topic came up.
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 4, 2010 18:12:45 GMT -5
My fiance was ok with it. I didn't feel totally out in the cold but i could tell that he was trying to not completely alienate our friend just the same as me. Plus, At that point, I wasn't defending the safety of my child, so... My Fiance tends to back down a lot when it comes to this particular couple (friend and wife). But when we talk about it he feels the same as me about having my son there.
My tactic on this will be like I said, just declining the invites. Telling her that she's not doing something right with her dog, or speaking negative about her choices won't do any good. But I will just decline an invite and when they ask why I will explain I'm not comfortable having my son around their unpredictably aggressive dog, and leave it as that. I can't control her actions but I can control my son's safety.
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Post by hellsbells on Apr 5, 2010 4:59:59 GMT -5
Sounds like the right plan, I'd do exactly the same thing
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Post by cherry on Apr 8, 2010 4:53:20 GMT -5
I hate that this woman is ok with her dog snapping at children. The dog should (with all kindness) feel bottom of the pack and therefore not be in a position to show any aggression, never mind bite people! She just doesn't take responsibility for the fact that she has a badly trained dog and it is her fault when something happens. It's bad enough that it snaps, but going for the face is particularly bad, it's inches away from the neck. We've had so many cases here of children being seriously injured and killed by 'family dog' breeds lately. Your friend needs to teach her dog it's place in the pecking order before something unforgivable happens. She's already responsible for some small children growing up with a fear of dogs. I'm gobsmacked that she has done basically nothing about the dog biting this small girls face!
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 8, 2010 7:17:59 GMT -5
Cherry - She's done something about it....made excuses! "the dog might have been in pain", "he was probably just warning her", "this wouldn't have happened at our house", blah blah blah. she admitted the dog NEVER would have snapped at her or her husband in the same situation and probably only snapped at her (in warning) because he feels dominant over her.
UH....YEAH!! Sorry, I'm so fed up with the excuses and denial of this situation. OH!! I was hanging out with these people and their dog (which they claim isn't aggressive unless it has a good reason), and twice is just started growling at another dog while it was laying there!!!
ugh..
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