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Post by KSA on Dec 29, 2009 13:20:10 GMT -5
LOL! I am playing catch up and laughing so hard right now with all the posts! LOVE IT!
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Post by KSA on Jan 20, 2010 0:57:53 GMT -5
Yesterday when I had my exam to check on my internal stiches for my vaginal cuff I came out of the office and my husband asked if while the doc did the exam could he see my kidney stone. LOL that is why he is a lawyer and not a doctor! I just looked at him and said Ok honey its time for you to take a class on human anatomy!
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Post by sunshine78 on Jan 20, 2010 1:51:40 GMT -5
LMFAO @ fart/sh*t pants, exercise DVD bulge, and vaginal view of kidney stones.
Dude, just... lol.
You guys are f*cking hilarious!
I have one: My mom was listening to some lady on the radio, who was talking about having attended a concert, of some sort. The lady says in the broadcast how she's looking around, and all she sees are guys punched all full of holes, hoops here, barbells there, and are wearing tight t-shirts with strategically placed holes, and she's thinking, "Are girls really attracted to these guys?" And she gets her answer, because they're soon surrounded by all these girls, but that she ends up not being too surprised, because the girls look like...
Circus Farts. CIRCUS FARTS!
I swear, I almost had a milk of magnesia moment. Next time I talk to my mom, I'm going to have to be sitting on the toilet, lol.
I asked my mom if it's possible that this lady is related to us, because nobody on this PLANET, besides me or my relatives could POSSIBLY say anything like that. It's too... bizarre.
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Post by hellsbells on Jan 20, 2010 13:53:06 GMT -5
Erm, what's a circus fart??
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Post by Karen on Jan 24, 2010 8:13:58 GMT -5
So a friend and I had dinner and some strong margaritas last night. Her father in law passed away recently and we started talking about death, our wished if we were to die, etc.
We were talking about cremation. I said that what I'd want, and she said she'd leave that decision up to her husband if he was still around. We both agreed we'd like to be organ donors. But she made it clear that she wouldn't ever want her body to be donated to science and end up as a cadaver. It was kind of a heavy conversation for a bit, and then the margaritas kicked in... Next thing you know, we're talking about how awful it would be to end up as a cadaver and be used as an example for something. Like 'hey, fellas, take a look at this woman's ____!' After a good bit of back and forth about it, we finally decided that we'd only have our bodies donated to science if they kept the lights dimmed and only looked at us naked after a few drinks, or if they promised to practice liposuction on our thighs!
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Post by Karen on Jan 24, 2010 22:25:30 GMT -5
I'm not a twitter fan, but this one always makes me laugh! I forwarded it to my dad and his response was 'I think my house must be bugged!' The link might not work because of the sensor - you may have to manually enter it. twitter.com/sh*tmydadsays (it should be twitter.com/Sh*tmydadsays, but actually spell out the word!)
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Post by Karen on Feb 10, 2010 21:30:43 GMT -5
So I'm watching The New Adventures of Old Christine. Old Christine decides she wants to have another baby, but she's older, so she and the rest of the gang are at the doctor's office for an ultrasound so they can see how things look under the hood, if you will. One of her friends says something about her wanting to see the ultrasound kind of like how she wanted to see the shark cut open in Jaws.
The doctor begins the ultrasound and says 'So far, all I can see is an old boot and a New Jersey license plate."
How funny! Wouldn't you just DIE if a doc actually said that during an ultrasound?
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Post by JC on Feb 10, 2010 23:40:28 GMT -5
OHH MYYY GAWWWDDD!!!!! THAT'S HILARIOUS!!! That reminds me of when I had my lap. I asked my husband what the doctor said and he said, "well they found a pinky ring in there."
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Post by sunshine78 on Feb 11, 2010 2:44:01 GMT -5
LMFAO.
Yesterday, my homegirl at work asked me if our Resident Horrible Midget had gotten a haircut. I said I wasn't sure, but it kinda looked like it. My homegirl then responded, "Girl, she looks like Sophia from the Golden Girls." I had to run into the printer room to laugh my f*cking ass off. It was not so much the insult, itself... but the way she snuck it up on me.
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Post by Karen on Feb 11, 2010 7:33:02 GMT -5
Both funny!!!! Jenaya - did your husband come up with the pinkie ring joke, or did the doc? How mean to tell a joke when your tummy muscles are so messed up that it hurts to laugh!
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Post by JC on Feb 11, 2010 23:17:18 GMT -5
My husband said it. It was pretty damn funny. My LOL of the day, I was hanging out at a friend's house with his family, they have a 3 year old daughter and we kinda sorta started to teach her how to play chess. The dad was holding up each piece asking her what the name of it was. "This is the queen, this is the pawn, this is the rook." Then he held up the bishop and said, "do you know the name of this one, it starts with a B, bishhh..." She then yells out, "oh the bitch!!!" HAHA it was awesome.
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Post by sunshine78 on Feb 12, 2010 2:26:03 GMT -5
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaahahahaahaha!!!!
This is why I (sometimes) love kids!
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Post by Karen on Feb 12, 2010 7:37:37 GMT -5
That's HILARIOUS! Reminds me of a few years ago... A bunch of my old coworkers were at one woman's house. The old, dirty man of the group was talking to her then 4-year-old son. He was helping the kid figure out words that rhymed with 'truck'!
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Post by sunshine78 on Feb 13, 2010 0:25:10 GMT -5
LOLOL!
When I was little, and my brother was pretty much still learning how to pronounce things, I'd figured out that one of his mispronunciations was things that started with "th" he would say with the "f" sound, and other things like that. I'd have him repeat me saying things, and he'd be swearing, and my little six year old smart ass would be just tickled to death.
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Post by pamelaj on Feb 22, 2010 15:40:30 GMT -5
My LOL of the day...well, it was funny to me anyway
I live next to a pig farm and out on the road, between thier house and mine, sits a dead stock bin(holds dead piggies). Anyway, we are having a bit of a snow storm today and i was in a rush to get out to my van and get going before it got worse. My neighbours also have a dog who ventures to my yard all the time so when i seen it there, i stopped to pet him. Well lo and behold, in its mouth was a leg of a piggy from the bin. It scared the begizzies out of me so bad that the snow under my feet suddenly went yellow? Go figure you can still have idents at 35.
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