renee
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Posts: 19
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Post by renee on Jul 6, 2009 9:08:05 GMT -5
Okay, I have had it up to my eyeballs with people complaining about their little aches and pains. My friend came over the other day and it was one of my really bad days where I am in bed because I just cant even stand up for very long without wanting to puke. All she kept talking about was this headache that she had. She wouldnt even take anything for it, but was content to whine to me for two hours about it. Being so sick and feeling so horrible for the past seven months has made me very unsympathetic to people's little everyday pains. I swear that if I can get through this and get back to a normal state I will NEVER complain about a headache or because I stubbed my freaking toe, or because I have a cold, etc. I felt like telling her to take an Advil and shut the heck up. But, I am just too nice to say something like that. People just dont understand how painfull and unrelenting this endo can be.
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hurtz
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Post by hurtz on Jul 6, 2009 19:46:41 GMT -5
Ahh you're so much nicer than me. I have been known to answer those type of comments by pulling out my drugs. I once went "you want ibuprofen I have 800s, you want naproxen, celebrex, you can't have my toradol" When they said no I went well you're not in pain yet. Yes I am evil.
We understand your pain here.
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renee
New Member
Posts: 19
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Post by renee on Jul 6, 2009 20:33:26 GMT -5
HA! I wish I could have said something like that. ;D
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Post by Amanda on Jul 6, 2009 20:52:06 GMT -5
But what about people who have more painful or debilitating conditions or diseases? Don't you think someone who is dying slowly and painfully from terminal cancer would see us in the same way you see your friend? Compared to what a lot of people are going through in the world, we have it pretty easy.
Who are any of us to criticize how someone else feels? As people who deal with pain everyday, we should be more compassionate to others who don't feel good, for whatever reason. We don't know what other people are going through and we shouldn't judge them or complain about them venting to us. That's part of being a friend, after all.
And as someone who can't take anything stronger than over the counter Advil or Tylenol, all you other ladies should feel really lucky that you can take your bag full of pain killers.
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Post by Karen on Jul 6, 2009 20:57:01 GMT -5
I can see both sides of things. I certainly have my poor me days, but most days I try to turn it around: think of how strong you are!! (Too optimistic?
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Post by ouchy on Jul 6, 2009 23:42:35 GMT -5
But what about people who have more painful or debilitating conditions or diseases? Don't you think someone who is dying slowly and painfully from terminal cancer would see us in the same way you see your friend? Compared to what a lot of people are going through in the world, we have it pretty easy. Amen!
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Post by JC on Jul 7, 2009 5:36:22 GMT -5
I think it was in another thread but it said: If we all took our problems and put them in the middle, we'd probably take back our own problems over someone elses.
Or something like that... lol make sense?
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Post by JC on Jul 7, 2009 5:37:30 GMT -5
But yeah I can understand what it's like to become calloused to other people's pain. To each their own, I guess.
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hurtz
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Post by hurtz on Jul 7, 2009 7:45:09 GMT -5
I wasn't saying we should be insensitive to other's pain. Its just frustrating when you're obviously in pain and they're compaining to you. My best friend once had cramps for the first time a few years ago she told me about it in a way that did not make me upset. I guess what really gets me is that I have had friends make themselves seem like heroes for suffering through their headache and at the same time making me feel that I was being weak for taking stuff for my pain. I have actually had someone complain about a headache and when I suggested they take something reply that only weak people take stuff for pain. That's the kind of behavior that leads to me taking out my bag of pills that I accumulated because they all did not help. Of course we should try to be nicer, but I had to develop a tougher skin to deal with the number of people who had no problem telling me that I was faking. I recently had someone telling me that I was making myself sick by being on the diet and that if I started eating everything again I would get better. Sometimes the gentler approach of I'd rather not talk about this just does not work.
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hurtz
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Post by hurtz on Jul 7, 2009 7:48:08 GMT -5
Also its nice to have this space here, where we can come let it out INSTEAD of saying shut up already to our friends that we otherwise love.
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renee
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Posts: 19
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Post by renee on Jul 7, 2009 8:42:37 GMT -5
But what about people who have more painful or debilitating conditions or diseases? Don't you think someone who is dying slowly and painfully from terminal cancer would see us in the same way you see your friend? Compared to what a lot of people are going through in the world, we have it pretty easy. Who are any of us to criticize how someone else feels? As people who deal with pain everyday, we should be more compassionate to others who don't feel good, for whatever reason. We don't know what other people are going through and we shouldn't judge them or complain about them venting to us. That's part of being a friend, after all. And as someone who can't take anything stronger than over the counter Advil or Tylenol, all you other ladies should feel really lucky that you can take your bag full of pain killers. Whoah! hold on a minute here...I am not talking about people who are in chronic pain or have debilitating diseases. I was referring to one specific person who is healthy and has no problem taking medication complaining to me about a headache that she could easily get rid of while I am in bed racked with pain.
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renee
New Member
Posts: 19
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Post by renee on Jul 7, 2009 8:43:40 GMT -5
Also its nice to have this space here, where we can come let it out INSTEAD of saying shut up already to our friends that we otherwise love. Thats why I posted my rant and I am glad you understand.
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Post by undiagnosed on Jul 7, 2009 12:51:14 GMT -5
My husband drives me crazy. He is not very sympathetic whenever I am in pain from my period and if I complain about it he is just like "what am I supposed to do about it". I thought he would be more sympathetic when I was pregnant. I was wrong. If I mentioned any backache or feet swelling all I heard about was his backache. After I had the baby I had a headache with at least a daily migrane for about 4 months and he would just hand off the baby as soon as I was done with work. Then when he finally got his first migrane I had to drive him to ER because he needed pain killers. I said how would you feel right now if handed you the baby and said I'm tired and going to bed.
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Post by JC on Jul 9, 2009 5:05:14 GMT -5
Also its nice to have this space here, where we can come let it out INSTEAD of saying shut up already to our friends that we otherwise love. Thats why I posted my rant and I am glad you understand. lol yeah, I love my friends and I love my husband, but SOMETIMES you get GRRRR!!!!!!! lol Don't worry, vent all you want here! That's what it's for. ;D
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