Hands and Pens off the belly!

[baby bonnet]

When I was expecting my 1st child the temp who was supposed to cover for me while on maternity leave kept poking my belly with a pen and even touched below the belt and my rear end. I felt violated and had her "fired", if you can fire a temp. Now that I'm expecting my second child my sister walked up to me and literally jiggled my belly, I wanted to slap her! It really sickened me that she did that especially since we haven't been in the best of terms and just the way she did it was just so awkward. She didn't ask, or just touch....... she jiggled by belly! It brought back all those violated feelings again. Am I going to have to wear a tee shirt that says HANDS OF THE BELLY!!! Maybe I'm being a little over sensitive but the experience with the temp left a bad taste in my mouth and my sister suddenly just walking up to me and jiggling my belly the way she did brought it all back.

[rach]

I've never been pregnant bit have seen it with people around me, i hate how people assume that a baby belly gives them a license to touch you! I understand it would be very confronting, and an invasion of personal space. I only ever touch the bellys of my good friends, not just random people, and also in an appropraite situation where i've asked first!!!

I don't know that there is much you can do about it unfortunately. Maybe try and give people warnings looks if they look like they're coming to grab you? A look that says don't f**kin touch me!

[cherry]

I really sympathise. They wouldn't do it if you weren't pregnant, and you don't become public property when you're carrying a baby, if anything I'd be more wary of a pregnant mother's sense of space and protectiveness of her unborn child.
If I were you I'd get me some karate moves. "Poke me with a pen biatch?! How about a karate chop to the neck!"
But seriously, I would have broken that temps finger. So rude!

[jjuls22]

i always ask the pregger people that i know if they would mind if i touched their belly. This way, they have the option to say, not right now, or yes.. and they know its coming! you should have grabbed your sisters stomach back and said, well how do you like it!!! ;D

[Karen]

Yeah, next time someone tries it, reach up and grab a boob or grab 'em in the junk! That'll stop em.

[baby bonnet]

LOL, I don't mind when people ask and are delicate about it, but just running up to you and literally jiggling your belly like you were Good Old Saint Nick was just horrible, and the temp poking me with pens and patting me on the butt and slidding her finger on my front was just disgusting.... Talk about feeling harrased and by a woman of all people that made it creepier and so unexpected.

Heeheehee Olsenka I like the idea of grabbing a boob or some other body part back to see if they like it.

[puddleduck]

It's odd that someone who is not close to you thinks they have the right to touch what is personal, since even with a baby out of the womb they would not dare touch him/her unless they were friends/family!

I wonder what they think gives them the right?

I wonder, too, whether pregnant women who don't have endo feel the same way about an invasion of their space and violation when their bump is touched, uninvited.

I notice that have much stronger feelings and less tolerance for people who disrespect my privacy and dignity than women who don't have endo, and this is without ever having been pregnant.

...which is to say that I completely understand your response to this.

Has your sister ever been pregnant herself? Did she pick up on how you felt or did you say something to her afterwards?

[Karen]

Uh, I have a non-endo friend that had a complete STRANGER come up to her in the grocery store and grab their belly, and yes, she was completely offended! She totally made the stranger feel like an arse by telling her she wasn't even pregnant (even though she clearly was pregnant). Ha! Kind of hard to pull that one with family, though...

[baby bonnet]

My sister was pregnant as a teen and her son will start H.S. this fall. She always seems to act without thinking, she's very impulsive and is very self-absorbed (her own son makes this observation), so I'm sure she is clueless and if I say anything she will act offended and will once again play the victim. I have a feeling that she is bypolar. She herself is afraid to get help because she feels that she will be put away or that her son will be taken away.

Ha! I've had strangers ask me what my due date is while NOT pregnant........ and my response has been "Oh I'm not pregnant, just fat".

[ouchy]

May 21, 2009 13:23:21 GMT -5 Karen said:

She totally made the stranger feel like an arse by telling her she wasn't even pregnant (even though she clearly was pregnant). Ha! Kind of hard to pull that one with family, though...

I LOOOOOOOOVE this!!!!

[angel]

I've started to show recently and I too am amazed and annoyed at how many people think it's ok to touch a pregnant ladies tummy. Esp the ones who say "is it ok to touch?" AS THEY ARE MID REACH!, touching the bump before I've had a chance to reply! I think I'm going to start grabbing boobs as suggested!

[omaklackey]

Ha ha, grab away! I would have never tolerated someone touching. But I'm really sensitive and always have been. I always started moving back if someone would come too close. Its instinctic for me! It also gets the point across that your not comfortable pretty quickly for all but the most insenstive people. Insensitive people wont' get anything unless its the belly grab back. I think you should ask them when there due date is and see what response you get??

[JC]

I think people forget that it's still your body they're touching. It's like you wouldn't randomly touch someone's belly for fun! It doesn't feel any different when you're pregnant either!