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Post by Kitty on Mar 31, 2009 15:04:03 GMT -5
I recently felt overwhelmed with this disease. Having to struggle with it the past year.
Being in almost constant pain and having your s/o not fully understand the extent of what your going through is hard. I'm not sure how people are in relationships when they have endo.. when the depression hitting so much and being on emotional edge its hard to get into the mood. I've ended up just feeling guilty for not being active with my partner.
Back to the topic at hand. I ended up picking up this book called " Living well with endometriosis: What your doctor doesnt tell you... that you need to know." Its helped me get an understanding of things what endo really is and why i feel the way i do. Its helped me realize I'm not the only one suffering with endo and that there are a lot of us out there.
Its also helped me realize, that it is the high amount of estrogen that has also affected my "not being in the mood" for sex.
So for those of you feeling overwhelmed and helpless this is a really good book to pick up. I hope it can help someone else like it has helped me.
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Post by jjuls22 on Mar 31, 2009 15:23:00 GMT -5
i agree thats a great book!! i hope youre feeling better! ;D
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Post by JC on May 25, 2009 15:42:27 GMT -5
A couple of days ago I was trying to be intimate with my husband and I just couldn't do it because it was SO painful. Instead of him being understanding he just pushed me away and got angry. I never felt so hurt before that he could be so mean. I still don't quite know how to feel about it.
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Post by Amanda on May 25, 2009 17:59:21 GMT -5
Jenaya-
I'm really sorry that you had to deal with that situation and feel that way. I understand that it can be a lot to deal with on your husband's part, but I don't think he dealt with the situation in the right way. Have you tried talking to him since the incident? I know it sounds really cliche, but communication really is the key.
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Post by JC on May 28, 2009 12:22:57 GMT -5
I didn't talk to him about it because he doesn't remember doing it. He had been drinking. But aside from that incident, he's been his normal self. I'm hoping he doesn't act like that toward me again because that was so mean.
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Post by Kitty on May 28, 2009 16:18:44 GMT -5
Omg drinking is so evil everytime my bf is a jerk its cause he is intoxicated one way or another
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Post by KSA on May 30, 2009 15:34:22 GMT -5
Good book I picked that one up at the library the other day. I think that men just have a hard time understanding us in general so just chalk it up as them being from a different planet. I have no idea how they got here on earth but they are here now and we just have to deal with them!
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Post by Kitty on Jun 9, 2009 11:18:24 GMT -5
LOL agreed!!
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Post by omaklackey on Jun 9, 2009 13:49:28 GMT -5
I think if its painful for sex its very, very hard on a realationship. however I realize 'being in the mood' is affected by hormones but you can ignore them (if its not a pain issue). I get myself in the mood on purpose by finding an exceptionally romantic tv show, book or whatever. I even occasionally shop for naughty lingerie. Don't let your hormones rule your love life anymore then your normal life. I often instigate love makin' when i'm 'not in the mood' because I realize we flat out need it and my mood shouldn't be parcel to that. I will stress that we use lots of lube on those nights because your body doesn't produce well without the hormones. Its almost always good though inspite of everything. (although it does take a patient partner) I have always had some serious messed up hormones though and hot flashes so I've got lots of practice dealing with this issue. It takes a lot of work on your part to push past the funk's of everday life and create feelings/emotions that aren't there. I promise though it is possible. Don't rule yourself out! the most annoying thing about all this is the lack of control we have over our own sickly bodies. This is one area that we can cheat ourselves into thinking we can't do it anymore. So buy some candles and massage lotion and even if necessary a naughty movie and go for it! (I hope that wasn't to preachy... Its supposed to be encouraging... you can do this)
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Post by Kitty on Jun 13, 2009 14:46:17 GMT -5
^_~ Not preachy thank you for the support!
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Post by jenk12 on Jun 22, 2009 14:57:24 GMT -5
Karla - you're absolutely right. That wasn't preachy at all, but was somewhat inspriational. I agree we can't let our hormones rule our lives. I remember when I used to have a strong libido and be very eager to be intimate with my s/o and it has been hard to deal with that fact that I no longer feel that way much of the time. But I do it anyways because after we get started it is better, and I don't think about the pain as much as I do beforehand. The most important thing is that whoever you're with is understanding because endo and its symptoms already can make us feel bad enough without someone adding to that. I am with a very understanding and patient man right now, but I still feel bad sometimes because I can't be intimate all the time and feel bad turning him down. But I just keep hoping that one of these days I will have intercourse pain-free and not be wary of it ever again.
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Post by omaklackey on Jun 25, 2009 23:31:45 GMT -5
No. 24 on the list "The most important sex organ is the brain".
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Post by JC on Jul 2, 2009 9:10:19 GMT -5
Karla, you're my hero!!
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