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Post by lizzylou on Mar 31, 2010 21:43:26 GMT -5
I don't know how my friends and family stand me, sometimes I think I'm going to run them all away.
I have ZERO patience and am snapping at everyone. I'm really resentful of most things with my fiance right now (he is a good guy), I've got a 5 year old and if he's being a typical boy (running, being silly etc) it's really irritating sometimes and I just want him to sit down and be quiet. Everything at work just bugs me too! GRRRRR.... I hate feeling like this but I don't know how to stop. I'm exhuasted, I'm stressed (just bought a house and moved), I'm tired of feeling like crap all the time, and I'm just plain worn out. I can't relax when I'd like to because there is so much I need to get done right now (most with the house and moving).
I have no idea what I'm looking for here, maybe just to hear that me being a beeyotch will pass and my family won't hate me forever?
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Post by Karen on Apr 1, 2010 6:43:14 GMT -5
Ah, yes, I can relate! It's an awful feeling, and I'm not quite sure how I got past that, but here's an obvious question - what are you doing to relax, what are you doing for yourself to decompress?
Sorry for the short message- have to run!
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 1, 2010 7:20:50 GMT -5
I'm not doing much, I honestly don't have much time, life is SO crazy right now. I have no time after work, and on the weekends Im trying to get some projects done so everything can be unpacked and settled in so I can relax sooner!
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Post by Karen on Apr 1, 2010 17:18:53 GMT -5
I know, I know, it's hard to be anything but crabby when you're in so much pain, but you KNOW that once everything is settled at home, you'll just find something else that will stop you from relaxing, and then once that's over, you'll find something else to stop you from relaxing, etc. Can you promise to take 20 minutes 3 times a week to do something all by yourself that you absolutely love? Take a walk, soak in the tub, watch a tv show without interruption, etc.? Make a pact with your family so you can get just a bit of 'me' time to decompress. And is there anything you can do that you know alleviates the pain a bit so that doesn't get you down quite as much?
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 1, 2010 20:52:24 GMT -5
Yeah...I really need to take some time for me. I'm hoping that with the weather being nicer I can get out more. we just got a treadmill and I know this sounds odd, but blasting some music and running might actually help. Thinking it might just releave some stress, let me shut my mind down for a while and it usually makes me feel better to do something physical.
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Post by hellsbells on Apr 2, 2010 12:44:38 GMT -5
Are you on any meds? I had crazy horrible aggressive mood swings before my op and my medication, which is Provera. Seems to have settled me right down.
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 3, 2010 9:29:22 GMT -5
No, the dr told me "that's normal pms". I don't know what provera is, is it a hormone based thing or is it an anti-depresent? I can't be on any hormone based treatments, my risk of stroke it too high, my dr isn't comfortable giving me anything.
On Monday I go to the endocrinologist to get my thyroid tested and at the reccomendation from some people on here, i'm going to ask for a full test for all my hormone levels so maybe we can get something back in balance.
Do you ever feel like your shooting in the dark trying to find some answer that might help?
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Post by hellsbells on Apr 3, 2010 13:01:27 GMT -5
Yeah, everyday!
Provera is a progestin hormone drug. Some people get worse mood swings with it, it seems to have settled mine down. Have been in a crappy mood today - I think it's down the fact that my food intake this past week has been nothing but rubbish. Time to get back on track!
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 3, 2010 14:27:44 GMT -5
My problem with food is that I LOVE how the bad stuff tastes and my fiance is an amazing cook. I desprately need to cut so much caffine out of my diet SO badly. I usually have 1-2 cups of coffee in the morning and then maybe 2 soda's throught the day. I'm so addicted and I really really need to cut back.
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Post by Karen on Apr 3, 2010 14:43:06 GMT -5
Yup, I often feel it's a shot in the dark with doctors, and even when I get 'answers', I take it with a grain of salt.. Good luck @ your appointment.
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kari
New Member
Posts: 26
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Post by kari on Apr 3, 2010 14:46:19 GMT -5
I can totally relate.
I hope you are feeling better soon, and I totally agree about getting in some 'me' time soon. Have you had a massage before? Just one hour out of your week! You deserve it.
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Post by KSA on Apr 3, 2010 14:52:00 GMT -5
Sounds like you need a day at the spa! Or atleast each day after work give yourself a half hr of me time. A bath, buy fresh flowers to cheer yourself up, yoga or a massage from the fiance'?
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Post by lizzylou on Apr 3, 2010 18:22:43 GMT -5
haha, good luck with the fiance giving me a massage. Ryan's a great guy, but he's not the most supportive/understanding in the world. I think he's handling everything the best way he knows now, I don't want to make it seem like he's terrible because he's definatly not. It's just that I think his understanding of what I'm actually going through is limited. He's probably just as tired of hearing me whine and I am of whining! I do have a friend who's going to school to be a massage therapist, so maybe I should see if she wants to "practice" on me!
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Post by JC on Apr 4, 2010 12:50:34 GMT -5
I have been going to counseling lately because of a lot of problems in my personal life. I had this exact conversation with her about how every little thing irritates the crap out of me! After talking with her, she brought a LOT of clarity to my random bitchyness and I hope that maybe telling you about it will make sense and help you realize what's causing you to be irritable too.
I started the conversation on how someone said something to me that angered me for a week. The topic of the comment is not what stuck out to me though, but it was my inappropriate reaction to such a stupid and small comment. Then I told the therapist about a really crappy incident and when she asked me how I felt, I said, "hmm interesting, I don't really feel anything."
She then asked me, "Why do you think you had such a strong reaction to a very small annoying comment, but had no reaction at all to something so big?"
At first I was like, geez that is confusing. Why is it that I'm having such innapropriate reactions to things? One minute I'm snapping someone's head off because they looked at me funny, and the next I'm indifferent to something extremely bad!
She said that this is a very common coping mechanism that people have. You emotionally react to something harmless because you're diverting your attention from something bigger that's bothering you. It's easier to react over something small than to react to something that demands more of your attention and problem solving and possibly, decisions that are difficult to make.
She gave me this advice and I hope it helps you too: pay attention to your feelings and reactions to things. If they seem inapropriate to the situation, then ask yourself why. If you see that you are underreacting to something then ask yourself what is so scary about this situation that you can't deal with it? Eventually, you may realize that you are not dealing with something bigger in your life, some decision that is extremely difficult to make, or some problem that is difficult to solve. Facing the fear of that problem head on can possibly alleviate the inappropriate emotional responses to such small things.
Hope this makes sense.
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Post by hellsbells on Apr 4, 2010 14:12:10 GMT -5
I does a bit, I was horrible to my brother on the phone today because he was going to be late and hadn't rang to tell me. He turned up at my house saying 'Are you still angry with me?' and I could have wept. It's not his fault, he's the sweetest guy you could ever hope to meet. And when my family left I found out he'd got a taxi to my house just so he wouldn't be too late, but he seriously can't afford to waste his money on sh*t like that. I'm such a bitch to him at times yet all he wanted to do was ask me what was wrong and give me a big hug, tell me everything was ok. I'm welling up again now.
Sonce my op and the medication my mood swings/moods in general have been at least 200% better, but this weekend for some reason it's come back again, and I feel so bad for being a bitch, and so bad for feeling bad when I've been feeling so good recently. My family put up with a lot of sh1t.
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