Post by lily loves aka cherry on Sept 28, 2006 6:28:51 GMT -5
Hiya, some may remember me as Lilyloves, but I couldn't remember my log in details
4 months from my official diagnosis things have changed a lot for me.
I am now at university studying building surveying, and although I missed a whole day on tuesday (rushing to my lecture kicked off my pain and i had to go home) I am so excited about what will come next.
I have moved to flat near a huge beautiful park, with my younger sister so my mum is out of the picture. She was unkind about my frustration over the endo, despite having had it herself, so I am much happier.
I have also started a new job, which means I can make a fresh start ajnd ask for a specialist chair etc.
The endo, despite treatment with Prostap injections and HRT seems to be worsening but I am determined not to let it ruin me yet.
I went through a crisis of confidence about this recently, telling my boyfriend that I din't want children, as I didn't want to go through the pain and feeling of failure if I couldn't conceive or carry a child to term.
Children for me would be more important than my career, but having nightmares about dying babies in my early teens (when the endo problems started) has left me with a crippling fear of what might happen next.
I am staying positive though, knowing full well that my pain my be very small compared to some of you other ladies. As all my fresh starts have shown me recently, you never know when the rainbow will come out
After my diagnosis, losing friends, my job, my home and nearly my sanity, I hope I can say I came out safely on the other side.
Things got really bad and painful to the point where I just wanted to disappear off the planet. I hope this goes to show that keeping a positive outlook can save you from yourself, and that trying to make things better for other people around you can be the best thing you can do for yourself.
Here's hoping I will have children one day that I can teach this to!
Hope you are all happy and well, and I am so glad to be back on here xXx
PS the TENS ova machine (small and easy to wear, around £20 - £30) is a godsend if you prefer not to take painkillers, I seriously suggest this as an investment, best wishes.
4 months from my official diagnosis things have changed a lot for me.
I am now at university studying building surveying, and although I missed a whole day on tuesday (rushing to my lecture kicked off my pain and i had to go home) I am so excited about what will come next.
I have moved to flat near a huge beautiful park, with my younger sister so my mum is out of the picture. She was unkind about my frustration over the endo, despite having had it herself, so I am much happier.
I have also started a new job, which means I can make a fresh start ajnd ask for a specialist chair etc.
The endo, despite treatment with Prostap injections and HRT seems to be worsening but I am determined not to let it ruin me yet.
I went through a crisis of confidence about this recently, telling my boyfriend that I din't want children, as I didn't want to go through the pain and feeling of failure if I couldn't conceive or carry a child to term.
Children for me would be more important than my career, but having nightmares about dying babies in my early teens (when the endo problems started) has left me with a crippling fear of what might happen next.
I am staying positive though, knowing full well that my pain my be very small compared to some of you other ladies. As all my fresh starts have shown me recently, you never know when the rainbow will come out
After my diagnosis, losing friends, my job, my home and nearly my sanity, I hope I can say I came out safely on the other side.
Things got really bad and painful to the point where I just wanted to disappear off the planet. I hope this goes to show that keeping a positive outlook can save you from yourself, and that trying to make things better for other people around you can be the best thing you can do for yourself.
Here's hoping I will have children one day that I can teach this to!
Hope you are all happy and well, and I am so glad to be back on here xXx
PS the TENS ova machine (small and easy to wear, around £20 - £30) is a godsend if you prefer not to take painkillers, I seriously suggest this as an investment, best wishes.