barb
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by barb on Dec 30, 2007 10:51:08 GMT -5
Well ladies, I have some news for you all. I am scheduled for a partial hysterectomy on Jan 3, 2008. Not only do I have endo, I have adnomyosis. I've seen 4 OB's, one of them was a surgeon who works with endo and she is the one that told me a month or so ago, that I had adnomyosis and that if ya remove the uterus, you will stop bleeding and the pain will stop. Not only will I have to have my uterus removed, the doc is also taking my cervix. That part I don't understand. Plus I planned to keep my ovaries and with that stays the endo. I can't take this anymore. Christmas or any other day has not been good for me this last year, especially. I feel like I am falling apart. My BF has 5 kids from a previous marriage and he doesn't get to see those kids. Tonight we were at his parents for Christmas and his youngest's brothers wife (in her 40's) had their first baby. Ellie is almost a year. I saw my BF playing with Ellie and my heart stopped. I didn't have kids in the past for other personal and medical reasons and know I regret it completely! I know that this is a hard decision, but I am going to be 41 in Feb. I've tried everything else. I don't know what to do anymore. I am crying as I am typing this post, because I am emotionally drained. I can't sleep, I am moody as heck and I pray to god that this works. If I hurt when I bleed then stop the bleeding. I've done BC, Lupron, Laps, ring, everything... I am exhausted. I sure could use some emotional support from you all.
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Post by staceys on Dec 30, 2007 13:15:44 GMT -5
Good luck with your surgery. I'm sure that was a very difficult decision to make. Your date is my one year anniversary from my last surgery. I'm sorry to hear that your holiday has been rough, but here's to hoping that the surgery will start you on your way to a happy and healthy new year. Please let me know how it goes; I will be sending you my thoughts on Thursday. Hang in there!
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Post by zuzana23 on Dec 30, 2007 14:10:07 GMT -5
Good luck Barb, you've made the right decision. Life with constant pain is horrific. My endo pain brought me to tears many times and I usually don't cry easily. We have to be pro active and make some hard choices, but in the end, if we feel better on a daily basis, that's all that counts. Good luck and keep a positive attitude. We'll be thinking of you on thursday. Please let us know how you're doing as soon as you're able to.
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Post by ouchy on Dec 30, 2007 23:17:48 GMT -5
Hiya, Barb. Sorry it has come to this, but I do hope that you find relief. You do know, howver, that adenomyosis is only diagnosed AFTER hysterectomy, right? It's only suspected until the path report comes back when they dissect the uterus after hysterectomy. We used to have a member on here, Lynette, who was thought to have had adenomyosis. They took her uterus, and it came back negative for adeno.
I'm so sorry you are going through so much. Sounds like you are definitely drained. I hope you get relief.
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barb
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by barb on Dec 31, 2007 0:46:00 GMT -5
Thank you all for being here for me. *tears* The closer I get to the date of my surgery, the more of an emotional mess I become. I am scared to death of hospitals from my M/C accident and now I have to face these places again. My last and only surgery in my life time was on March 18, 2006 (mine and Ray's one year anniversary). It just about drove us apart and me to the lock unit, literally. I just want this day over with.
Ouchy, I realize that adenomyosis can't be verified until after the hysterectomy. However, in my last lap, there was documentation that it existed. Thoughts are "if I hurt when I bleed, then stop the bleeding". It's the only out I know anymore. *tears* I don't know where to turn anymore. I can't fight this anymore. I just can't. I have no life. My brain injury took my career and future away from me and endo is taking every bit of strength I have left to survive.
I am so scared. Today felt like I was paralyzed from the fear. I have been trying to paint my hallway for months and I wanted it done before I laid around and looked at it for 4 - 6 weeks. I couldn't do it. I was paralyzed. I couldn't even talk or think or act. I am scared of the surgery. I am scared of hospitals. I am scared of this not fixing the problem. I am sad I didn't have kids. I am a MESS!!!!!!!!!!! Just hang with me on this one GF. I am doing my best to make it to Thursday!!!!
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Post by ouchy on Dec 31, 2007 1:11:09 GMT -5
ahhh, Barb. Huge hugs. Would there be any way you'd try another regular lap for endo before having the hysterectomy? If you just want to stop the bleeding, they can do some type of "electrocution" to the inside of the uterus that makes the period stop for about 5 years. As far as removing the cervix, if you have no endo on it, I wouldn't let them take it. It's a supporting structure. They randomly take it bc you *could* get cervical cancer. But if all of your paps have been negative all these years, I wouldn't let them take it.
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Post by cass on Dec 31, 2007 1:23:35 GMT -5
have u tried going into a faux menopause with hormonal agents? just wondering if u noticed anything whilst int hat state? i have been told i need a full hysterectomy at 30 so im 5 years off that!
good luck barb. i hope this provides you with alot of pain relief like they believe it will.
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barb
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by barb on Dec 31, 2007 10:09:34 GMT -5
With adeno the whole uterus (inside,outside & walls) are affected. I've done alot of research on it and the end results are hyster. The doc and I did discuss things last week at my appt. I freaked in her office totally. There was an option for another lap and 9 months of lupron, but the chances of the pain coming back in 3 - 4 months after that, were high. That is what happened the last time. I'm drained! I don't want 5 or 6 laps. I've read here how some women have more problems from the scar tissue, etc. I am not up for more surgeries!!!! Bringing a child into my brain injured world is not safe nor the right place for a child. (ouchy I know what you are going to say on that one. HUGS) I've taken Brevail and Pro-Gest cream, soy protein shakes, different diet, etc. I've gained almost 30 pounds since I was diagnosed with endo in Jun 05. My hormones have been messed with so much throughout that time. Every effort I make to lose the weight, doesn't seem to work. I'm just exhausted!
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barb
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by barb on Dec 31, 2007 10:46:01 GMT -5
I just had a phone discussion with the Doc. I asked her why she was taking the cervix and she told me that with endo & adeno that there still would be chances of bleeding by keeping the cervix. We are trying to stop the bleeding, so the cervix needs to go. Also, I asked her about burning the insides to stop the bleeding and she told me that it can aggrevate the adeno and endo and make things worse. She also calmed some of my surgery day fears. She told me that she would come see me in the pre-op area and not wait to talk to me in the operating room. She also informed me that I will get the Verset drug before I go to the OR so that I won't remember a thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She is aware of my anxiety and I am certain she will treat it as it comes that day! I asked her if taking the uterus would make me gain weight and she said that should not happen. We are no longer messing with my hormones and that she would work with me after I re-cooperate to help get the weight off. I am feeling somewhat better. Isn't Thursday here yet tho................*ugh*
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barb
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by barb on Jan 2, 2008 10:36:05 GMT -5
Another day to go and of course, two days before my surgery, I get my monthly enemy. I can't take any pain meds so now I sit and suffer. I bet by tomorrow morning, I'll be begging her to take this out! We hoping that getting my enemy won't interefere with her doing my surgery. Now I am a little scared.
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Post by ouchy on Jan 2, 2008 10:45:30 GMT -5
Ooh, Barb! Hang in there! It's probably good you're on your period. The implants will be bleeding, so they'll be easier to see!
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barb
Junior Member
Posts: 70
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Post by barb on Jan 2, 2008 11:05:32 GMT -5
Are you serious Ouchy? This could be a good thing??? I talked with the doc last night and I could almost here some hesitation in her voice. I'm nervous.
Funny thing is at least God is on my emotional and memory side... I can now remember the day before my surgery exactly why I am having this surgery done.. ha ha ha ha
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Post by ouchy on Jan 2, 2008 12:42:37 GMT -5
Hum. Maybe it's different for hysterectomy? My OBGYN prefers performing laps while you're on your period bc the endometriosis is most visible.
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Post by minnie on Jan 4, 2008 11:18:01 GMT -5
Good Luck Barb! Hope it all has gone as well as it can xx
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Post by staceys on Jan 4, 2008 11:37:53 GMT -5
Hi Barb,
I hope your surgery went well and you are on the road to recovery. My thoughts are with you!
Stacey
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