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Post by tfaith on Aug 19, 2008 15:45:49 GMT -5
sooo...you may not believe me...but i haven't had sex in 2 1/2 years... :/
i feel SO guilty about it....and then i wonder, man if it has been this long, how bad is it going to hurt when it DOES happen!? it honestly isn't that pleasurable to me, but at the same time i know my partner is probably going crazy....especially since men tend to get a lot more testy without sex then females...at least me anyways....
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Post by anneny on Aug 19, 2008 16:21:10 GMT -5
Pelvic floor physical therapy was invaluable for me. I started going about a`month before we started TTC, and it helped tremendously. Check out those threads for more info.
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Post by jjuls22 on Aug 20, 2008 7:26:37 GMT -5
Pelvic therapy has also worked for me!! i was able to have sex three days in a row!! whooohhooo my boyfriend and i gave each other high-fives. hahaha.
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Post by loladoggie on Aug 29, 2008 7:58:57 GMT -5
I've actually found that even arrousal hurts. And orgasm really hurts. Anybody besides me get that?
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Post by mommajo2b on Sept 4, 2008 22:49:25 GMT -5
I've actually found that even arrousal hurts. And orgasm really hurts. Anybody besides me get that? I thought I was the only one. I feel really bad... My husband really wants sex, but I'm so scared. It hurts so much. Just having him on top of me hurts (my abdomen is so tender to the touch), and other positions (rear-entry, me on top) he always hits my cervix and that hurts even more. Is there any way for me to have sex with my husband without the pain? I am going to the Dr on the 23rd. I have been dealing with all kinds of endo-like symptoms, but when I went to the Dr in May, they found a cyst on my liver but I was told, after a CT Scan, that it was a normal cyst? Whatever that means... They didn't even do a physical exam since that wasn't due til August. They didn't even touch me or anything... I have a new Dr now, and I'm really gonna bring up the idea of this being endo... I have a list of symptoms, including dates. I also have a list of my moms symptoms (she had a hysterectomy at 30 yrs old from cysts and cancer on her cervix.). Any how, is there any way to have sex with my husband that wont kill me before I get to the Dr?
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Post by JC on Apr 28, 2009 8:07:15 GMT -5
I've actually found that even arrousal hurts. And orgasm really hurts. Anybody besides me get that? Sex hurts me all the time, the only way I can find it pleasurable is to either avoid certain times a month, like right before and right after my period, or just find a position that doesn't hurt. Sometimes all it takes is for me to tilt my hips (arching my back) and it usually makes it better. The ultimate insult: is the cramps I get after having an orgasm. That is so depressing. I still enjoy sex but sometimes when it hurts too much I just sit and cry and cry because sex isn't supposed to hurt! It's seriously not fair and I get so upset about it.
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Post by JC on Apr 28, 2009 8:11:03 GMT -5
sooo...you may not believe me...but i haven't had sex in 2 1/2 years... :/ i feel SO guilty about it....and then i wonder, man if it has been this long, how bad is it going to hurt when it DOES happen!? it honestly isn't that pleasurable to me, but at the same time i know my partner is probably going crazy....especially since men tend to get a lot more testy without sex then females...at least me anyways.... I'm so sorry you're going through this. Have you guys tried to do other things beside penetration? Oral is fun! and you wont have to deal with getting your uterus punched around! Also giving eachother body massages can give you and your husband some physical closeness. Sometimes when I'm having too much pain, I'll "please" my husband then he'll give me a nice massage or something. But if you can find some sexual pleasure without the penetration then maybe it will help ease the guilty feelings and show your husband that you're trying. This might build a strong bond between you two.
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Post by rach on Apr 28, 2009 21:52:06 GMT -5
I've been on this board for quite a while, yet this is really the first time i've read this thread...mostly because the whole situation just depresses me. I also find sex quite painful, and thanks to the numerous medications i am on have almost NO sex drive at all, which makes it even harder. My bf of three years is really good about it, but i just feel so guilty, we used to both be very sexual and now i'm lucky if we do the deed once a month. We've tried a few different positions and found that missionary and spooning are just about all i can manage; the other day i managed from behind for about 5 seconds but was overcome by intense stabbing pain to the left and just below my belly button. I try to remain intimate in other ways, but like i said it's really hard with the total lack of libido thing. Anyone have any advice on this?
My GP also recommended some cream (sorry don't remember the name of it) that they use to treat hemmaroids, its just an over the counter but has some pain reliever and anesthetic type stuff in it, so i use that beforehand. I also had a LETTZ done because the gyn thought maybe it was so painful because of the swelling. I found that helped a little, i feel less like there's a cheese grater rubbing in my cervix!
Any advice on how to counteract libido zapping medications would be greatly appreciated!!
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Post by JC on May 1, 2009 7:17:32 GMT -5
You know, all these medications out there for stupid men and their stupid viagra. What about us?? Why isn't there any help for us and our sex drive?
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Post by rach on May 11, 2009 3:48:18 GMT -5
I second that! All the way. It's funny but, every time i hear those ads on the radio about men not satisfying their women (the ad is like "mine's a minute and a half man" and "my man only last 2 minutes", etc) i'm like why can't i have a 2 minutes man hahaha it would make life a lot easier for both of us
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Post by Karen on May 11, 2009 19:13:36 GMT -5
I'm actually terrified to have sex again! I haven't had sex since my symptoms came on full force, but before I knew what was going on for years I would always have twinges the day after sex. Funny - I was always super paranoid that I had caught something, even though I was always super careful. Now I'm assuming it was just endo!! So now that things have gotten worse and knowing what I know now and how yucky I feel after pelvic exams, I'm dreading sex... That's horrible!
There's a guy I've known for a while, we've been hanging out more lately and flirting a lot more, and I heard he asked a friend for my number so he can ask me out. I'm excited because I haven't liked someone in a long time and he's a lot of fun and nice, but I'm scared to even start dating someone again because I don't know how the physical part will go. I mean, I'm not quick to jump into the sack or anything and don't just give it up to anyone, he's got to be good to me, and I'd have to be able to tell him what's going on with me and if he didn't respond well things wouldn't go further, but I'm still scared! Sex in a new relationship is always fun and I'm afraid I'll be all uptight out of fear if things were to progress to the point that things get physical.
Is it sad that I notice that he has small hands and that kind of makes me feel a bit better about some of that?? ;D
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Post by ouchy on May 19, 2009 12:58:00 GMT -5
Posted by member jenaya in another thread Hey do laps usually make sex less painful? I miss enjoying sex It's so hard now. My lap is june 3rd and I'm actually kinda excited.....
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Post by Kitty on May 19, 2009 15:46:35 GMT -5
It was kinda of funny/sad the other day after having sex my bf apologized and said he hoped it didn't hurt and my response was "Oh it did but not as bad as last time!" I then burst out into laughter and so did he.. ooooohh stupid endo how i hate thy...
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Post by KSA on May 27, 2009 22:29:50 GMT -5
Sex is painful and I am also experiencing bleeding when I have sex. Odd times not at all close to my cycle. I am 33 in my prime ready any time but my husband thinks he is hurting me so we are kinda just waiting till this surgery to even try again. I understand how he feels he does not want to hurt me when you see someone bleeding I suppose it freaks us both out. Anyone else bleed while having sex?
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Post by ouchy on May 27, 2009 22:44:27 GMT -5
Bleeding during sex can often be caused by an infection. Simple overgrowth of normal, healthy bacteria can cause it. It happened to me for more than a year before a doctor finally tested me for simple bacterial vaginosis! Anything that can cause an imbalance can cause it, just like how taking antibiotics can cause a yeast infection. Anyway, ask your gynecologist for a pH test and vaginal culture. It's probably something so simple! My bleeding for more than a year went away after a one-week treatment of antibiotics!!!!
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